A Life in Squash
R I C H A R D M I L L M A N
Richard Millman, ex-USA Men’s National Squash Coach takes us on his Squash journey…
Having been asked by my lifelong friend, John Cordeaux, to write a piece for his website, detailing what squash is all about and why a person might like to play, I sat down and started to review my last 50 years involved in this sport.
I started to play because, as an awkward kid trying to find my way at a traditional British boarding school, my house tutor John Duncan Hill - not your usual private school teacher - had this idea that I might be suited to squash.
This was all well and good, but I didn’t know what squash was.
I procrastinated for a year, but finally, still struggling to fit in, I decided to give it a whirl. I was coming up twelve-years-old and, with my heart in my mouth, I showed up to the four venerable old courts that we had at Gresham’s school in Holt in the English county of Norfolk. A squash court is a little daunting if you don’t really know how the game works. Thirty-two feet long by twenty-one feet wide. White and bright. With red lines painted across the front walls at uneven progressions from the floor to just below ceiling height and then the uppermost line progressing to the back of the court running from fifteen feet on the front wall down to seven feet on the back wall.
Then there are another bunch of lines on the floor, which it turns out, are for serving and returning. So there I was, aged nearly 12, not too sure of myself, relying on the recommendation of the house tutor ….. yet here I sit fifty years later, having dedicated my life to squash and having had that life enriched and fulfilled beyond all imagining. How, you may ask, did that happen?
I think that it should be said to begin with, that squash is many things to many people and that every person experiences it slightly differently.
But the key is, every person can experience it. Able bodied, disabled to a large extent, young, old, wealthy, underserved communities, men, women, boys, girls, the famous, the unknown. Squash presents an opportunity for everyone - if you have the willingness to take it.
The game itself appears relatively simple. Imagine a giant chess board with just two pieces on it - pawns if you like. One black ( that’s you) and one white ( your opponent), You move your opponent around the court by striking the ball to the back corners to try and get them out of position and, when you feel you have got them out of position for long enough that they will not be able to quickly return the ball (and make you move more than them), you try playing the ball to the front of the court. Then you repeat as many times as required until they crack either physically or mentally or both.
It’s really about managing your time and resources better than they do. You try and get into position before they retrieve/hit the ball. If you hit the ball too fast or inaccurately, you will be short of time and you will find yourself on the wrong end of the rally. With the court being thirty-two feet long and twenty-one feet wide, there isn’t that much territory to defend or attack and so you have to be clever about it, because a human being in good condition who manages their time well, can easily cover the court.
So you have to be tricky and patient and make sure you don’t overreach and leave yourself out of position by being more interested in beating your opponent than you are in making sure you stay alive. It’s a little bit like life - the most important person in the exercise is you. If you forget to look after you - you die. Killing your opponent just doesn’t feel as good if you die in the process. Of course, after a while, you might find your decision making process becomes a little foggy.
I have frequently been certain that my superior intellect and genius would result in me comfortably beating an opponent - only to be summarily dismissed by someone who apparently was less than impressed with my obvious ( to me) abilities. All this is liable to lead to quite amusing situations, a tremendous workout, an appreciation for a fine opponent, a massive development of self-knowledge and self-esteem, a desire for growth, health, mental acuity and ultimately….. addiction.
In addition squash is an amazing passport to societies, groups, businesses, clubs and communities that you might never otherwise have entered. For me, it also brought me the blessing of my wife Pat, a Norfolk girl who has now won multiple US National masters titles and been the captain of England ladies 55+. If ever I have felt doubt over these last thirty years, she was always there to be my team mate and coach - ‘ just work on being the best Richard you can be,’ she always says, ‘ you can do it.’
Powerful words.
In 50 years of squash I have discovered that, with a racket and a pair of squash shoes in your bag, whether you’re in Toronto or Tokyo, Beijing or the Bahamas, you will be welcomed into the squash community. And once you’re welcomed in, jobs, friends, dentists, doctors, plumbers and builders, bankers and market gardeners will all become available to you. If Fun, fitness, friendship, fortitude and familial community are not things that attract you - beware! Do not enter in this place!
So I showed up to the four giant white rooms at Gresham’s in 1971 and I guess something magical happened. What? Well, first of all, unlike many sports where if you can’t make ‘the team’ you are discarded, with squash everyone can experience success. It might only be small success at the beginning, but it’s success just the same. Hit one ball. Hit one serve. Hit ten balls - progress and success. Wow - I CAN DO IT!
This is not to be sneezed at. Literally millions of people never have that feeling of athletic achievement. The main line sports teams at school are pretty much filled by the same ‘athletic kids’ for each season, and everyone else becomes resigned to the fact that they are ‘not athletic.’ This is crazy. But it’s even worse than that. Because the ‘I CAN DO IT’ feeling in squash carries over to many other elements of people’s lives.
The success mentality that early squash development engenders in everyone who is fortunate enough to have the opportunity to experience it, then leads to increased self-esteem and confidence. Is it an aberration that squash is the chosen sport of so many successful people? Or is it that squash has contributed to the success mentality and actual success of so many people of the highest demographic of success?
Society shoots itself in the foot when human potential is ‘switched off’ by avenues that actively discount the majority of participants. Not so with squash. Squash is a ‘can do’ pursuit. At Greshams I stumbled ( literally, a lot of the time) into a group of squash players that became my team-mates. Every one of them, were ‘can-do’ people. Most of their names won’t mean much to you - John Cordeaux, Michael Rawlings, Neil Campbell, Gawain Briars, Sau Meng Chan, Allistair Trollope, Nick Wall, Richard LeLievre, Steven Rudd, Christy Willstrop. They were fierce competitors and they wouldn’t have given you anything in a competitive match. But in practice, you couldn’t have wished for more encouragement.
Sau Meng Chan was from Malaysia. He literally spent hours on court playing with me when I was a struggling beginner. No one made him do it. He was just a generous spirit. John Cordeaux and his father Henry encouraged me, took me along to tournaments, made me feel that it was worth it. I never heard a discouraging word. Constructive criticism yes - but nothing negative from John and Henry.
Al Trollope and I practiced for years, Nick Wall befriended me - we later went to teach squash in Germany, Michael Rawlings ( a class above) made me feel I belonged. Christy Willstrop never failed to show up for our alumni team - even years after he had left the school - sometimes getting back to Yorkshire at 4 in the morning on the milk train. He was a pro at the time - and so far as I know he never asked for a penny in return. Such were the bonds that squash had created between us.
From an uncertain beginning, that small, awkward twelve-year-old (that I was then) was given the encouragement to believe that he could - and has gone on believing that for fifty years. Fifty years that has proffered riches beyond imagining. I won’t bore you with all the details - suffice it to say that I walked in the opening ceremony of the Pan American Games as the coach of the United States mens team, I have been lucky enough to have won more than a dozen national and international masters titles in three countries, I spent several years as a professional on the world tour, that John Cordeaux and I won the Norfolk Men’s Squash title 15 times between us, I was awarded the United States Olympic Committee’s Developmental Coach of the Year award and finally, that it has been my privilege to help literally thousands of people to embrace the ‘can do’ belief over the past 43 years that I have been a squash professional.
Despite these and many other high spots, some of the most treasured are from those early days at Gresham’s School and just after, from my team mates. Each school term, our squash coach Malcolm Willstrop, wrote a summary of the team’s performance for the school magazine. In one particular summary, he wrote the following words : ‘Gawain Briars would like to thank Richard Millman for training him this year.’ Gawain, who was at the time British Junior Champion and went on to be one of the great British Squash professionals of all time, had come to me and asked if I would be kind enough to take him running. When I had started squash a few years previously he was a god, way beyond this particular twelve year old’s social reach.
The first national title I ever won was a team title, the English junior inter-county championships in 1978. I was losing 2-0 in the final and deciding match. After my team mates rallied round me and told me I could do it, I came back and won 3-2 to win the match and the national championships for the team mates that had told me ‘ you can do it.’ The American mental health commentator Matthew Munich has recently written an article about this story. If you would like to see the full article you can see it here: https://www.altiusperformanceworks.com/floating-and-stinging-blog/2020/8/29/winning-and-winners-iii-richard-millman-on-joining-irreverence-amp-iconoclasm
You shouldn’t ( and I am sure you won’t ) take my word for it. If you haven’t tried squash or squash 57 ( a wonderful evolution of our sport played with a larger ball), you should have a go. The best thing is to find a local coach, who has a reputation for encouragement and positive thinking , who will instill the ‘can do’ mentality into you, show you the ropes and introduce you to some other like-minded folks. If you learn fundamental technique from the beginning you will be able to get much more out of your squash. If you do - and you enjoy it. Join a team. You will never regret it. And don’t worry about whether you are good enough. Your team mates won’t - they’ll just tell you week after week: ‘You can do it.’
If you are not sure where to go you can find all the national governing bodies at the World Squash website: www.worldsquash.org
Most national governing bodies have huge resources available on their web pages. If you have already played and feel you want to further explore the game, there are many additional resources.
Here are some that I have produced:
My book: ‘Raising Big Smiling Squash Kids’ co-written with New York Times reporter Georgetta Morque, is still available from Amazon. Despite its title, it’s really a road map for everyone who wants to explore the game. It isn’t a technical coaching book - its a guide to what to do - how to choose a coach, how often to practice and play, opportunities for children and adults. Many families have told me that they enjoyed reading together.
You can buy it here:
I have written for the US Squash publication Squash Magazine for more than 20 years. You can access all my articles which are full of coaching tips and general advice here:
https://squashmagazine.com/category/richard-millman/
And finally, if you want some amusement during difficult times, here is a link to my book ‘Angles - A Squash Anthology’ which is a glimpse of both some stories and strengths of great people in squash that have affected me and my own journey:
Good luck.
Squash will help you find your ‘can do’ spirit.
Richard Millman
October 22nd, 2020